Stop trying to be polite

We've been married for 24 days [officially anyway] and so far so good...

I have found myself astonished with the number of people who actually asks "How's married life treating you?" -- What do people want when they ask that? The problem is I don't believe that they honestly want to know. And although I can think of several flip and not-so-proper responses, I often find myself in need of something that gently lets the questioner know that it is an inane question yet still makes them go away satisfied that I'm happy with my decision to marry and haven't changed my mind thus far.

This question may appear to show an interest in the person's life, but it actually shows that the asker hasn't stopped to think that the marriage they're alluding to was NOT arranged, shotgun, green card, same-sex, a dumb joke... or simply, a BIG mistake. Whether or not the asker has taken the time to consider it, their question suggests doubt that the newlyweds were stable enough to justify marriage. It is not polite; it is thoughtless.

Let's start a little pop-culture trend away from this question. It's trite, it's unoriginal, and it's got to stop. If you must try to be nice, ask about life without the stress of wedding-planning. Now that's worth talking about.

But in case you are one of the few that really does care, I will tell you.

Truth is... NOTHING has changed.

Although fans of the Catholic church still frown upon the notion of "cohabitation", Mike and I [with our parents' blessings] lived together for a little bit over a year before tying the knot. This gave us a free pass on the pressure from the transition between having just a recreational partner to having a life partner. We already went through the disenchantments and disillusionments of marriage before even saying "I Do"... and instead of looking at our experiences as forms of rude awakening, we used them as stepping stones to deepen and strengthen our relationship. Given that, some might think that we must be over the glamour of the honeymoon stage, and if you think that, you are seriously mistaken.