Can You Hear Me Now?

How do you know when you are living in the middle of butt-fuck-nowhere?

When this annoying verizon guy won't even come to where you are....

Can you hear me now?

Ask anyone under thirty the first thing they think of after hearing that phrase and you'll likely hear back Verizon Wireless. For good or evil, the ads portraying this lonely Verizon Wireless employee asking the person on the other line if the connection is good, are everywhere. He probably can't even program his own contact list, but he could be at the most remote place, and sure enough, the other person on the other line never fail to hear him just fine. James Earl Jones, proves Verizon's campaign synergy ingenius, by topping the cherry at the end of the commercial. He sounds so damn convincing, doesn't he? He sure fooled me.

So Verizon prides itself to be the most reliable network in the nation. It works everywhere else, BUT West Virginia, apparently. Go figure. Why didn't we check the coverage map before terminating our contract with Sprint, you ask? I feel sorry for the customer service lady who had to listen to me bitch today for 45 minutes about how I just dropped my contract from another provider and purchased a new verizon phone for the exact same features that I am now being told I CANNOT USE due to my
geographic location... they can't even guarantee me a signal. How sad is that?

Video and Picture messaging feature? Useless. Web applications? Useless. Bluetooth capability? Useless. Basically, it's paper weight sitting in my purse with potential of acting like a phone ocassionally, depending on the "extended network's" mood that day. The decision of switching to Verizon seemed everything BUT stupid since my family and Mike's family are both on Verizon AND it was logically cheaper, but now
I'm sitting here wishing I had found this out before trekking to the Sprint store yesterday to cancel our contract which we've had since we lived in California. I didn't have a fancy phone... but at least I had signal.

Not "goooooood" Verizon guy.

Last weekend's shoot

A few shots from last weekend...

Coming out of the closet

So today's my day off. Some local elections going on or the other. I had a political phase in college. But my arse got radically reamed for going to an anti-war protest in the morning and then finishing the day at a Support the Troops rally. So it's probably not even the same thing, and I probably have better things to do, like fold the pile of laundry scrambled across our bedroom floor.. but I thought I'd take the time to share a small piece of glee that made me smile yesterday...

Yes!!! Despite my intemperate defiance to drop my double stuf oreos and McDonalds breakfast diet.. I continue to lose weight (probably credited to my recent immunity blowouts). But nonetheless, yesterday while I got ready for blue jeans day at work, I reached for my old jeans just wishful thinking, and what do you know!!! My ass fit in my size 6 jeans again!! Let's rejoice to the heavens of all clothes non-maternity. It probably makes me sound vane, but I don't care. It feels good to be able to reach into my closet again and rummage through pre-Ethan clothes safely tucked away in the back, where it hasn't seen light in almost a year. I was so estatic I even called my size-4 sister to gloat.

Nevermind the persistent flab of extra skin hanging around my gut, I'm afraid to admit that that might actually need a little bit of workout. I'm just rejoicing in the fact that I don't have to settle for my maternity jeans anymore!!!

Driving me crazy

I've always wondered if stupid fucking drivers know that they're stupid. Why else would anyone deliberately slow down for no apparent reason only to piss the rest of us working class by making us late to work for no reason. I don't take solace in the fact that stupid drivers are everywhere. I thought they all resided in California and when we left, I thought I would be retiring from the long commutes and will be getting away from bad drivers. Boy, was I wrong..... West Virginia drivers are just as bad, if not worse. I mean I understand that between the hours of 8-9 am and 5-6 pm, there's bound to be some kind of rush hour traffic just because of the sheer volume of people trying to go to work and back. But I am convinced that the majority of gridlock is because of these stupid fucking drivers who shouldn't have been allowed to operate a motor vehicle in the first place.

So let me give you a refresher test. Answer to the best of your knowledge, or lack thereof.


1) Turn signals are optional. True or False.

They're NOT optional, you fucking idiot. They're there for a reason. You switch on your turn signals according to which lane you want to merge into, check if it's clear, and merge WHEN it's clear. And unless you're driving your dad's 1980 minivan, the damn signals should turn itself off, you don't even have to do that. And notice I said WHEN it's clear? That doesn't mean "barely" missing my car, asshole.

2) I must slow down if there's something remotely interesting on the side of the road. True or False.

Wrong again dim-wit. You're just about the single most annoying thing on the road. Don't slow down because you see the bright flashing lights of a tow truck on the OTHER side of the highway... it doesn't concern you and believe me, it will not make your life any less inane. If you really want to see how bad of a wreck it is, watch the damn news, you'll get a much better view AND you won't be backing up traffic just to satisfy your curiosity.

3) Drivers are permitted to cruise in the passing lane. True or False.

You might think you're not being a jackass because you're driving the posted speed limit and you've got your car on cruise control but then suddenly you come up to someone who's going slower than you because they're only going a mile less than the posted speed limit, so you decide you'd cruise in the passing lane but maintain your law-abiding speed. Newsflash, jackass. Get out of the passing lane. Common human
decency should tell you to move and let people pass you. I think you're the same kind of inconsiderate asshole that don't start writing the check in the grocery store until AFTER the checker rings up all your stuff... like you have to wait for the final amount before you can write the date. Who still uses checks anyway????? But I digress.

4) There's no such thing as following too close. True or False.

If I tap on my brakes and your hood ends up in my trunk, that's because you were following too close dumbass. I shouldn't be able to see what color eyes you have just by looking back on my rear view mirror. And if you really think that riding on my ass will only signal me to go faster, you got another thing coming to you. The only thing it will do to me is piss me off and make me want to drive even slower to tick you off.


If you answered True to any of the following questions... not only should you consider yourself on my shitlist... you should definitely consider changing your driving habits (before you piss someone off into roadrage and blow your head off in the middle of the highway while you play with your ipod) OR perhaps consider taking up public transportation.

Say cheese

Everyone by now knows my son has become my favorite muse to photograph. Thank God he's not camera shy.

But besides taking random photos of Ethan (sometimes even using him for my makeshift poor man's home studio), I've actually started my quest to pursuing my photography business. I already have 2 weddings booked in June, and several Engagement Session along the way. Some are pro-bono, at least until I get my portfolio together, but I don't mind, and clearly, neither do my clients. They get free photos, I use them for my portfolio. It's a win-win situation.

I shot my first Engagement session about a month ago. The bride was so impressed she's hired me for her own wedding AND recommended me a friend of hers who also booked me for her June wedding.

So I was already feeling under the weather on Saturday, but I had previously scheduled an engagement shoot and didn't want to cancel. Besides, the couple is getting married in November and has yet hired a photographer, I didn't want to miss the opportunity of booking another wedding... so I took a nap that afternoon to try to gather up some energy, popped a motrin or two and went to the park, where we said we'd meet.

I have another engagement shoot scheduled for next Saturday... I hope I feel better by then...

It's harder than I thought

I got called out for slacking on my blog, and I must say I am guilty as charged. Actually, it's not that there's hasn't been anything to write about. I just haven't had the time... or the energy... or perhaps it's both. I'm too busy trying to master the super mom status.... which I'm learning the hard way, is a hell of a LOT harder than I thought... especially if your immune system isn't exactly on your side.

So if most of you didn't already know, Mike got hurt playing basketball (again) about 2 weeks ago and tore his ligament on his right ankle in half. He has since then been walking (or hobbling) around in crutches and is scheduled to get a cast put on tomorrow that he has to keep on for 2 months. It's not too uncharacteristic for him to get hurt, I guess. In fact, he's made a legacy out of getting injured, but usually he bounces right back -- though this time might be a little different. Although the orthopedic surgeon wanted to sound as optimistic as he could, he says we'll have to wait until the cast is off to find out if Mike's going to need reconstructive surgery or just "jump" right into physical therapy. To me, it means seeing my husband hobble around for another 2 months, waiting miserably to find out wether he'll need to get under the knife again. Lately he's resorted to playing basketball on the playstation, and watching the playoffs.

Believe me, I don't mind one bit taking care of him. Mostly, he can do everything by himself unless it involves carrying anything that might spill, or carrying Ethan around. But of course, as luck would have it, my strep came back over the weekend (apparently, the doctor says it might not have fully went way the first time around), and not to mention they also diagnosed me with a kidney infection. Supposedly, I'm on "stronger" antibiotics this time... though it's hard to submit to complete bedrest when I have a husband on crutches and a baby to take care of. I'm going to take a couple of days off from work, but unfortunately, I can only muster up enough energy to take Mike to work but I hesitate taking Ethan to daycare (since it's another 30-some miles out of the way). So what's a super mom to do?

Generally, we're surviving. Ethan has mostly been cooperative and has been sleeping through the night again which is when I get all my rest.